Facts That Hurt

I've been showered with too many facts that has left my dumbfounded today. Many too personal and many that sank my heart to the bottom of the ocean.

Attending this Junior World Entrepreneurship Forum (JWEF) thing has definitely been a bonding session that has allowed the DARTE gang to hang out more despite our busy schedules. I am thankful for this group of people that have opened my eyes to a world that I've been shadowed from but I am having doubts about knowing this world of theirs. I might be in the world but I know I am not of the world. Hence, some things I find difficult to accept but I truly truly love the people which leaves my heart in conflict.

I've learnt many things today that as a 20 year old I should have known earlier. I may have known some stuff but it all seemed so distance to me that it is almost not relatable but not till now. Not when it is happening to someone you know personally. Sometimes I want to know things but at the same time I don't want to lose my innocence or be bothered by it. Right now, my heart aches for them. I can only imagine how much more God's heart aches for them.

Jesus I pray that You'll change hearts
I pray that Your will be done
As You open my eyes and filled me with compassion
I pray You turn them back to Your original plan

Teach me Lord, not to judge
Teach me Lord, to love them much
Use me Lord, to touch their hearts
Use me Lord, Your will be done

I Vaguely Remember

I vaguely remember the smile on your face
I vaguely remember the smell that you take
I vaguely remember your touch on my waist
I vaguely remember the love that you gave

Yet what I see even to this day is that I'm still haunted by my every mistake
All that we had just happened too fast simply because I was wanted to be a part
Yes I admit that you made me smile but I will never forget the tears as night falls
A year has pass but there's still scars, I'm still slowly falling apart

Seeing you daily doesn't help my case
you seem so fine in that thick brown case
I wonder if you feel the same way
I wonder if being here is a big mistake

Things start showing, people start digging
I can't help but feel that people are judging
It's probably just me, that much I know
But I can't seem to find comfort in the friends that I know

Will they understand? Will they walk away?
I'm afraid that it'll all happen the very same way
Keep your mask on, I say everyday
Yet I know that one day it might crumble away

I vaguely remember the friends that I made
I vaguely remember the support that they gave
I vaguely remember being so free
I vaguely remember just being me